Crazy Party
by Domino626
Summary: What started out as a simple game of Clue at Yugi's house has turned into a hilarious bungle of anime nonesense. Participating characters include: Yugi (and Ya, Bakura (and Yami), Tristen, Joey, Tea (unfortunatly), Pegasus, Kaiba, Mokuba, Grandpa, Rebecca
1. Default Chapter

It starts out at Yugi's house and everyone (except Bakura) is playing CLUE.  
  
Joey: I know it was Mr.Green with the revolver in the study!  
Kaiba: Fool, you are Mr.Green. . .  
Yugi: What's the deal with having the last name of Mustard? And if I were him  
I wouldn't go around in a rain coat. I mean. . .  
Mokuba: Shut up and play!  
Tristen: Has anyone seen Bakura? I haven't seen him all. . .  
(Door slams open and Bakura dressed in a black leather jacket and wearing sunglasses)  
Bakura: Deal me in.  
Mai: IDIOT! This is CLUE! Not POKER!  
Kaiba: Do you have any coffee?  
Grandpa: I'll get some.  
Mokuba: I need coffee too!  
Kaiba: I don't think so.  
Joey: Do you have coke?  
Yugi: Only diet. . .  
Tristen: You're on a diet?  
Yugi: Uuuuhhh. . .  
(Interupted by Pegasus trying to poke out Tea's eye with the playing knife)  
Tea: You freak of nature!  
Grandpa: COFFEE!  
(Pegasus goes running towards the coffee and spills the kettle)  
Kaiba: MY COFFEE!!!!!! DEMON!!! DEMON!!!  
Yugi: Shut up Kaiba!  
(Kaiba turns around to smack Yugi, but smacks Mokuba)  
Kaiba: Hey little buddy. . .  
(Joey tries to smack Kaiba with the chair but he ducks and it hits Pegasus)  
Grandpa: WHAT THE DEVIL?!?  
(Grandpa goes around the room and smacks everyone)  
Tristen: Don't mess with me old man. . .  
(Tristen knocks out Grandpa)  
Yugi: GRANDPA!!!  
Tristen: Whoops....  
Mai: Does anyone know how to drive?  
(No response)  
Mai: Good. Lets steal the truck.  
Yugi: Bye Grandpa!  
(Joey gets in the front seat and waits for everyone to get in)  
Joey: Everybody in? Lets go!  
******  
Joey: Ok, howdya work this thing?  
Pegasus: (holding wine glass) Hehe! Oh no! Joseph has no idea how to   
drive this vehicle!  
Joey: Oh yeah? Well tell me, mister-I-know-how-to-drive, hows it work?  
Pegusus: It's really very simple, you just. . . .Hehe! Oh no! I've forgotten   
how to drive!  
Kaiba: Fools. You turn the keys then-  
Tristen: -REV IT!!!!  
(truck goes flying out of the garage, screeches onto the road, and zooms off twards town)  
Mai: Alriiiiiiight! (truck makes a very sharp left turn) Now that we're out,   
where do we wanna go?  
Kaiba: (growls) I never did get my coffee. . . (Glares at Pegasus who flashes   
an innocent smile)   
Joey: That sounds good! Coffee for everyone!  
Mokuba: (whispering) Yes!  
Kaiba: Except you.  
(Mokuba curses under breath)  
Bakura: I hate coffee. . .   
Joey: Do we want Starbucks or Java City? Tell me now.  
Tea: Java City. Starbucks tastes like mud.  
Kaiba: Fool! All coffee tastes like mud!  
Pegasus: Fight! Fight! Fight!  
(Bakura has now "evolved" into Yami Bakura, and is muttering evil things to himself)  
Yugi: But Joey, we have no money!  
Joey: Yeah we do.  
Yugi: Huh? But. . .how?  
Joey: Let's just say, his truck ain't the only thing I swiped.  
Yugi: JOEY!!!  
Kaiba: Exuse me, but what do we do with him?  
(Kaiba points to Pegasus, whom is now extremley drunk and hanging his   
head out the window like a dog)  
Yugi: Ummm. . .  
Tea: Bakura? Are you okay?  
(Yami Bakura is now scribbling evil plans on a scrap of paper and grinning sinisterly)  
Joey: We're here!  
Yugi: Pegasus, you stay! (Pegasus assumes dog-sitting position) Staaaaaay!   
Good boy! (glances at Yami Bakura and rolls his eyes) Yo, Bakura! Stay here and   
make sure he doesn't hurt himself, kay?  
(Yami Bakura grunts in reply)  
*****  
Tristen: Wow! They've got everything!!  
Kaiba: (drooling) I'm in heaven. . .  
Joey: Well then wipe up your slobber and order already!!  
Kaiba: I'll have a regular.  
Tea: Regular, please!  
Tristen: Java!  
Mai: Cappichino.  
Yugi: I'll have a cappichino too.  
Joey: Me too!  
Mokuba: Me too!  
Kaiba: Nice try.  
Mokuba: Grrrr. . .  
(Meanwhile, in the truck. . .)  
Pegasus: Woof. (translation: Hehe! Oh no! I do believe I'm extremly drunk, acting like a dog, and   
sitting next to a teen bent on trying to kill all mankind. . .darn!)  
(Yami Bakura opens truck door and leaves to start his evil procedures. Pegusus   
watches with intrest)  
(Yami Bakura walks into an open space)  
Y. Bakura: Behold the new leader of your world!!!!! HA HA HA H-  
(Bakura is standing in the middle of the street and just got hit by a semi   
truck. He is dead. Pegasus gallops away)  
********  
Yugi: What? This isn't what I ordered! I hate bad service. . .  
(Yugi evolves into Yami Yugi)  
Yami Yugi: Excuse me good sir!  
Worker: Yes?  
Y. Yugi: This is NOT what I ordered!  
Worker: Whadda ya want me to do? I'm just the janitor!  
Y. Yugi: Grrrrr. . . OPEN YOUR MIND!  
(The janitor screams and falls over dead)  
Manager: What's all that commotion?!  
Tristen: Let's get outta here!  
(Kaiba jumps through large glass window for no reason at all)  
Joey: Weirdo!  
Kaiba: Fool!  
(Everyone is out except Mokuba and Yami Yugi. Mokuba is behind the   
counter throwing scalding coffee at anyone who gets near him, and Yami   
Yugi has been backed into a corner. His only defense is to ocasionally yell   
"open your mind!" to knock out a few workers)  
Tea: Kaiba! Aren't you going to save your brother?  
(Kaiba & Joey are locked together in combat. Kaiba appears to be winning.   
Tristen & Mai are placing bets)  
Tea: Kaiba! Whadda ya have?!  
(Kaiba punches Joey one last time and knocks him out)  
Kaiba: (panting) A victory!   
(He then slugs Tea and knocks her out, just 'cause she's too butt ugly   
to look at anymore. Kaiba runs inside and lunges for Mokuba, whom   
mistakes his brother for a worker and tosses a coffee grenade at Kaiba.)  
Kaiba: Aaaaaahhh! Why you little #$% $$ % *@#*#!!!  
(Kaiba grabs Mokuba and starts spanking him repeatedly. The workers   
back off, horrified, and go for Yami Yugi)  
Y. Yugi: My. . .powers. . .weakening. . .open. . . your. . . mi-  
(Yugi goes back to normal and faints)  
Tea: YUGI!!!!! YUGI NOOOOO!  
(Yugi wakes up for a split seconed and mutters:)  
Yugi: It's Yugi "O"!!  
(Then flops over again)   
Kaiba: Such a pity to have wasted that precious coffee money on him. . .  
Tristen: Where's Bakura?  
Tea: *sob* Yugi! I have to save him!  
(Pegasus arrives on the scene in a strange red costume)  
Pegasus: Fat chance.  
Kaiba: You! You coffee demon!  
Pegasus: Don't be ridiculous Kaiba boy. I'm here to save little Yugi boy.  
Tristen: Ugh! I *barf* found. . . Bakura.  
(Joey recovers from his condition, sees Bukura's grody body, and faints again)  
Mai: Look! (points to Pegasus) What is he doing?!  
Pegasus: (makes rocket sound affects) It's Turbo Time!  
(Pegasus attempts to climb through the broken window, but notices the many   
workers)  
Pegasus: Never mind! (runs to hide behind Mai)  
Mai: Get away from me!!!  
(Joey arises, making an effort not to look at Bakura)  
Joey: I'll save ya Yugi!  
(Joey runs inside, followed by Kaiba. They fight their way to Yugi and together   
drag his body out of the coffee shop. Mokuba is left to fend for himself.)  
Tea: Oh Yugi!  
Tristen: Give him some air!  
(Mai backs up and accidently steps on Bakura, making an indescrible noise in   
the process. Kaiba begins CPR on Yugi without even checking if he's breathing)  
Tristen: Oh, geez! Not like that Kaiba!  
(Yugi wakes up and begins choking on the extra air)  
Joey: Ugh. . .That was gross.  
Mokuba: Big brother! Save me!!!  
Tea: You LEFT Mokuba in there?!  
Pegasus (whom is no longer drunk): Kaiba, you're even more cold hearted   
than I thought. Owww! My head! What's wrong?! (Pegasus is now clutching   
his head in pain)  
Kaiba: Don't tell me that after all these years of drinking, this is your first   
hangover!  
Yugi: Wh-What happened?  
Joey: You did that freaky evolution thing, killed the janitor, fainted, and nearly   
got pounded. Other than that, nothing.  
Yugi: This millenium puzzle has been nothing but trouble lately!  
(throws puzzle across the parking lot. It stabs Bakura in the chest)  
Pegasus: I don't feel good. . .  
(runs over to Bakura and throws up on him. Yugi is now sitting cross-legged   
on the asphalt looking pouty)  
Kaiba: Well that was uncalled for!  
Yugi: I promise not to hurt anyone ever again.  
(Mai tries to comfort him, but Yugi smacks her)  
Kaiba: Goodness, that was a short lived vow.  
(Pegasus is now disgustedly staring at the grody mess that used to be Bakura)  
Pegasus: I don't think. . . I need the puzzle. . . . or the ring anymore. 


	2. Continued

Mai: Isn't it made of solid gold?  
(Kaiba blinks and dashes for Bakura)  
All: NO! Kaiba, don't!  
(Kaiba runs a bit too far, tpips over Bakura, and lands on the other side of him)  
Kaiba: Now they're both MINE!!  
Yugi: Kaiba, don't! that's just sick.  
(Kaiba is about to remove the puzzle and ring from Bakura, when another semi comes speeding around the corner)  
All: Kaiba!!  
(Kaiba turns and sees the truck's driver)  
Kaiba: Aah! It's Bakura!! He's......A GHOST??!!  
Ghost Y. Bakura: You'll not get MY ring, or the puzzle!   
Kaiba: AAAAA!!! (ducks as the semi passes over him)  
Joey: I don't see him. Do you think he moved in time?  
Kaiba: Cough, cough! (trenchcoat gets cought on a chain) Woah! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! (is being dragged by his coat)  
Yugi: Look! There he is underneath!  
(Kaiba comes up on the back end of the semi. He's still being dragged)  
Kaiba: Do -ow- something -ow- you fools! Ow!  
Ghost Y. Bakura: (looking in his side view mirror) WHAT?! I'll take care of you! (begins to do wheelies in circles, Kaiba swinging behind him)  
Kaiba: Wooooooaaaaaaah! Wooooooaaaaaah!  
(Mokuba saggers out of the coffee shop and sees his brother)  
Tristen: Mokuba?! Don't worry, we'll save Kaiba!  
Mokuba: (grinning) Don't bother. I'm enjoying this.  
(Kaiba's coat comes loose and he goes flying into a nearby tree trunk)  
Tristen: I'll call the cops!  
Mai: I'll get the paramedics!  
Joey: I gotta use the john...  
Mokuba: Ha ha haaa! Snort! Ha!  
Yugi: This is Bakura all over again! Speaking of which, where's the semi?  
Ghost Y. Bakura: (charging the tree) Now I got you, ya' lousy stinkin'-  
Ghost Bakura: You're a horrid driver, you know.  
Ghost Y. Bakura: Shut up! No one invited you.  
Ghost Bakura: Wait! That's Kaiba! Are you bloody insane?! (tries to take the wheel)  
Ghost Y. Bakura: Get back in your cage!  
(semi is swerving violently due to Bakura/ Y. Bakura's lousy driving. It crashes into a house)  
Ghost Bakura: Pff! Now you've REALLY done it.  
Yugi: Is'nt that Rebecca's house?  
(Rebecca comes running out, clutching her teddy)  
Rebecca: Yugi?! So, you're behind this?! (holds up her teddy) I will eat you alive! Grr! (notices Kaiba, whom is still unconcious under the tree) Grr! Now you'll get it!! (wonds up to smack Kaiba with the bear, but Kaiba awakens, grabbing the bear just in time. He then proceeds to tear it in half)  
Rebecca: HEY!!! That's my teddy!! WAAAAAAA!  
Kaiba: (kicks Rebeccca) Oh, put a sock in it!  
Yugi: Kaiba, you're alive!  
Mokuba: (snaps fingers) Darn! 


End file.
